literature

KaitoPuri: Tsubame 22

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What I wanted to tell you

June 5th

“Tezuka? I’m… back..” Fuji stopped his pace.

Tezuka sat on the bench again, the back of his hand covering his mouth, staring intensely at the ground near his feet. The butterfly statue was long gone.

“what… what happened?” Cautiously, Fuji closed in on him.

“Just now… Tsubame was-…”

Fuji looked around. “Tsubame? He was here?”

Tezuka nodded in silence, still staring at the ground.

Not really knowing what to do, Fuji held the bottle of orange juice he got them against Tezuka’s cheek, to cool him down.

Slowly, Tezuka gazed up to him. Never before had Fuji seen him this defenseless and flabbergasted.

“Fuji…. What should I do?... he kissed me…”

“…. That’s….” Fuji stared at him, not sure of what to say.

Both were silent for a while.

“I’m…. I’m sorry.. Shall we go home?” Fuji started.

“h.. ah.. Let’s…” Tezuka got himself up and walked towards the exit.

Fuji followed, but stayed a step behind him.

“Are you… upset with him?”

“hm?...”

Tezuka sighed. “..No… just confused..”

“I see…” carefully, Fuji placed a hand on Tezuka’s arm.

He assumed the man’d be angsty and pull his arm away out of reflex. But Tezuka seemed to calm down to his touch.

 

Arriving home, Tezuka dumped himself on the couch.

Fuji knew his way around by now, so he went to make him a cup of tea to calm down.

He sat next to him, doubting a bit to lay his head on the other's shoulder for comfort.

Tezuka patted the youngster's hair, without looking at him, to assure him he'd be alright.

"....You.. don't like him that way?" Fuji gazed ahead of himself, a neutral expression on his face.

"It's... I don't know.

I thought I knew a lot about him.

That I knew what he was like...

But with this... It feels like I know nothing about him..."

Fuji bit his lip agonized.

"Tsubame.... Tsubame is a coward..."

"....?" Tezuka glanced to his friend.

"...If Tsubame really loves you, he ought to tell you as the person who he really is. Not hide behind masks and an alias.

If he really loves you, he should show the courage to tell you in person."

Fuji got up, not looking at Tezuka.

"Fuji... I appreciate it, but you shouldn't have to be so distressed about it.

It's a matter between Tsubame and me, after all."

"No, it does concern me." Fuji turned to him.

"Because I--..."

His words stocked as his eyes met Tezuka's.

A fluster pulled across his face. After all, telling him this was...

All the courage sank into his shoes as he looked down to the man in front of him. Who he cherished so much.

But courage was what was driving him. A fool's courage, perhaps.

But sincere.

Right.

He wouldn't lose to Tsubame.

He would expose himself. And tell Tezuka straight forward

.....

But still... looking him into the eyes was so difficult...

"b-Because I.....l....like you..."

His eyes trailed down again in embarrassment.

Tezuka's gaze remained on Fuji, though.

He was surprised by himself how calm he was feeling.

Even though Fuji had just told him something incredible.

"fuji, I-..."

"-I should go home!" Fuji turned to the door as fast as he could.

"Wha-? Wait!"  Tezuka clung to his wrist, leaving Fuji no chance to escape.

"That was-.. I mean-.. d-don't think too much of it. I just.... just..."

Fuji gave up on struggling and avoided his look.

"Fuji, listen to me." Tezuka grabbed his shoulders, making the younger pinch his eyes.

"...I'm sorry... I'm a coward too... I have no right to lecture Tsubame..."

Tezuka's grip lessened and he rested his hand on the boy's upper arms.

"Fuji.... Do you like me? "

"......." Fuji dared to shyly peek at Tezuka.

His look was gentle. Not hostile...

"......y....yes.." Fuji answered.

Tezuka smiled a bit watery. "I like you too..."

“Huh??” Fuji's eyes enlarged, not buying any of the words Tezuka was currently uttering.

Wait….wait, what??

Tezuka continued: "Do you love me?"

Fuji's gaze shot down, his cheeks burning.

"....Do you?" Tezuka urged.

"y-yes..."

"good...." Tezuka leaned his front head against the other's and closed his eyes, heaving a rather stressed sigh.

“Good….” He repeated to himself.

".....I think I love you too..."

Fuji swallowed. "..You.. think?"

"I suppose."

"....you suppose?" Fuji taunted a bit.

Tezuka sighed again. "...I do."

Fuji dared to smile, a bit insecure.

"...you....do.. huh?"

"Ah..."

".....Why? Why me? and not-..."

Tezuka tightened his grip. He showed a rare smile. One he wouldn’t show to just anyone.

"Why indeed? Hmm…

....Unlike Tsubame, you are real..

I can have you with me if I want to. Protect you. Talk to you casually.

Even though I think of Tsubame as someone precious to me.... I can't be with him how I can be with you..

Before becoming one's lover, one first has to be friends."

His words were like he was summing up a report. But the sound in his voice was sincere and nothing but the truth.

Tezuka stroked Fuji's cheek, that had become a bit moist.

Some tears of disbelieve had appeared in the 2 flustered blue eyes.

"Also, Tsubame belongs to this city. I can't simply take that away.

...I'm sure that.. If it's you, Tsubame will be able of forgiving me."

Fuji rubbed his eyes, making himself small.

"I....I don't believe this...

Why.. would you choose someone like me?

Over him?

Over anyone?

Even though I'm nothing special at all... you'd... still want someone like me?"

Tezuka rubbed the back of his head, a bit unsettled.

"I'm... actually pretty amazed that two people confessed to a stern and aloof person like me... I can only be grateful...

But Fuji.. You are not worthless.

You are a bright and cheerful person. Being with you is never boring and I can feel at ease with you around me.

I don't have to go out of my way for you to understand just what I mean.

Also, I've never been one to take a fancy to extravagant people.

I don't need someone to dazzle me.

I just wish for someone I can be with. In good and bad times.

Someone like you, Fuji.

To me, you are just perfect...."

“….” Fuji giggled anxious. “I can’t believe you. Saying all that is so not like you…You’re being incredibly straight forward too. This is really unexpected.”

Tezuka grunted. “Then what do you want me to say?”

“Are you… sure about this? I’m not just asking you to be my best friend here. Plus, I’m a boy…”

“Fuji.” Tezuka cupped his chin. Almost as if wanting to tell him to shut up.

“I agree to this, have more confidence in yourself. I won’t come to regret it.”

Fuji gazed at him, not quite sure of what to do. Tezuka had to admit he looked cute.

He leaned down to him.

“I’m sorry… I’m not very experienced, but…”

Slowly, he rubbed his nose past the other’s. They were so close.

They could feel each other’s breath. Each other’s warmth.

It was almost difficult to hold back.

But Tezuka wanted to take his time. He wanted to treat Fuji gently.

He wanted to imprint this moment in his memory.

Right. The memory of his first love.

Tezuka gently brushed his lips past Fuji’s. A shy response was given.

As an agreement, Tezuka took his lips, pulling the small boy close against him.

Fuji clinged his fingers into the back of Tezuka’s shirt, searching for his warmth.

He only now realized just how much he REALLY wanted to be with Tezuka.

He tried his hardest to suppress a sob as he answered to Tezuka’s passion.

Of course, Tezuka had no idea how difficult this had really been for him…

Tezuka took a small distance, their lips still touching.

“Are you.. okay?.. Scared?”

Fuji shook his head a bit.

“I’m just…. really happy… Tezuka. Meeting you changed me…Thank you..”

“…..” Tezuka sighed, burying his nose in Fuji’s neck.

“No… Thank you, Fuji. For being by my side..”

Fuji blushed. Feeling Tezuka’s breath, at quite a temperature, against his skin.

Slowly, Tezuka pulled him along for them to both fall onto the couch.

Tezuka laid him down on his back, leaning over him.

“w-wha- wait! T-this is a little-“ Fuji stuttered, his face bright red.

“shhh…..” Tezuka leaned in and kissed him again.

Fuji surrendered, wrapping his arms around Tezuka.

Slowly feeling the fabric of the other’s shirt.

The same way Tezuka was doing…

There was no telling how far things would go…

If it wasn’t for Tezuka’s phone to ring, before anything.

Still holding Fuji, Tezuka grabbed for it after a ring or five.

“Yeah?” Tezuka sure hoped that from the pissed tone of his voice, his opponent would notice he’d wanted to keep it short.

A little curious, Fuji looked up to the other man, whose face turned a shade paler and more serious as he heard who was the one to call him.

“Yes… I am, yes….. Hm, he’s here…” Tezuka’s eyes drifted down to Fuji as he slowly handed him the phone.

“Hello?” Fuji answered.

The solemn dialect of Oshitari sounded.

“Ya, Syu… I’ve got some bad news…

This evenin’….

 

Your dad was arrested.”

 

first: umihoshi.deviantart.com/art/Gr…
previous: umihoshi.deviantart.com/art/Gr…
next: umihoshi.deviantart.com/art/Gr…

sorta feels like the rest of the story was one big build up to this point xD
It feels pretty much like a milestone for me.
I'm still sad that the 2 people I want to read it the most won't read it, but I got some great reviews from other people. Kao-chan started reading it too~<3

This concludes the 2nd part of the story, 'Fuji'. (what? we're only halve ways?)
the next part will be 'Atobe'
© 2012 - 2024 UmiHoshi
Comments1
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chibikaoruchan's avatar
Atobe... arrested? XDD What was his 1000 men secret police doing?

AND DAMMIT, at the best of moments! Just when friggin Tezuka realized and kissed Fuji and was about to lose control. GAH. Oshitari, I feel like strangling you right now!

Please update? :D